Retraction of sorts

Late last night Julius surprised me by explaining he had been reading my posts and one was wrong and it needed to be corrected.

As an adult I work tirelessly to set a good example for my son as well as other people that I might come into contact with. My father always told me that a man or woman of character always stood up for their mistakes, knowingly or otherwise.

Julius, I publicly stand corrected that you were not stuck in the tree, you were just pretending to be.

109 days and its going to be OK

No one said it was going to be smooth sailing, I was prepared for that. I thought perhaps I could handle it, my naivete' is now posted in bright neon lights across the country. Although instead of hunching my shoulders and sauntering off somewhere tail between my legs. I stand tall and proud that I did do what so many people are afraid to, that perhaps instead of being the final stop in a story I was the important bridge that will help lead to Chen's success, After all we cannot be the hero in the story every time.

Chen came over last night with his new host dad and although I had thought it would be awkward it wasn't. Allen is a kind man with a strong will and a soft smile. These are things that Chen needed that I could not provide that Allen can, as most people that know me can attest is I am not the discipline maven of SW Ohio.
I thought to myself after the guests had left and I turned off the front porch lights. Chen still weighing heavy on my mind all was good and it was going to be OK. Chen had found someone to help him and as I learned through the night his new family had confided in me that Chen was helping them through a lonely Holiday time. So is Allen helping Chen or Chen helping Allen. I am not sure but what I do know is there is a reason for everything and although we might not see it at first the answer is usually reveled in time and it is often better then we ever expected.

Chen will reach his goals now much easier with Allens help, just as he was able to easily reach the top of the Christmas tree with ours.

100 days

Its been a hundred days so I have been told. I battle with the thought I have been a failure.
We drove Chen last Friday night to his new home. I could not help but think about how this must be what it is like when you turn a pet into the shelter. The family all of us including Julius piled into the car, each loading a piece of Chen's luggage into the trunk. Along the 30 mile journey we stopped for what the boys called "The last supper".

Driving down the road past home after home of merrily brightly decorated houses I tried to keep the conversation light the whole time yet in the back of my mind I kept questioning myself. At 7:30 we pulled up at the meeting spot where we were to hand off Chen to someone who could help Chen. Chen's grades had been a roller coaster since he had arrived, sinking desperately low then reaching stellar heights when pressed with termination of the program. As a working mom, with one child in an alternative school program and another exchange student from Germany, 6 dogs and a traveling husband, caring for an Asian student with cultural gaps became overwhelming to me. Chen was sinking academically and I was trying to help the best I could while holding the anchor and treading water. The group that was handling the exchange students saw the situation and with expert ease stepped in and saved both Chen and I from drowning.

Chen is now happily resettled in a city not far from us. His life will be expectedly very different, but I am sure he will definitely prosper and have a more successful year then he ever thought possible.

The Ouch heard around the world

He loves to cook. Julius is my spontaneous exchange student. He is determined to live every moment to its fullest. I have come home and found him climbing trees, where he has gotten stuck and had to be retrieved, sliding down banisters, walking three miles to a skateboard park to get some exercise which is pretty good since he doesn’t skateboard. So it was no surprise when he started baking cookies. Everyday he would work to perfect his chocolate chip cookie recipe, (and yes he cleans up after he is done).
Then late last week I heard him talking in the kitchen. I knew no one was home so I went to see what was happening. There he stood making cookies with the computer propped on the counter as he mixed away he was skyping with his dad. Now Julius's dad happens to be a chef at his own restaurant and since they were skyping he was watching his son cook. Awed by modern technology and the ability to do this I left the room so as not to disturb the private moment. I was barely into the family room when a blood-curdling shriek was heard. I rushed back to find Julius nursing burnt fingers. His dad was there asking if he was OK.
After a moment Julius shrugged and went back to his work but not before I asked what happened. "I picked up a hot cookie sheet, my dad saw it and tried to warn me."


I looked at him and said I guess that was the loudest scream ever, Julius cocked his head like a quizzical puppy, "your dad heard it in Hamburg>"

We're an inch taller and a whole lot smarter

I started measuring the boys shortly after they arrived, in green crayon (it's what was the only writing utensil in my pen cup that worked or had some resemblance of a point, and still is) Their names scratched out with lines taken from across the top of their heads.
Since then each month they have come to me and said "Please measure me, I think I have grown." Each month these two boys from two totally different worlds stand before me and my green pencil as I scratch off their ever growing height. Each time I do this I get a flash in my mind of someone else doing this for my son, I find myself wondering would she stop what she was doing to measure him and then send me a quick note, would she smile and pat him on his ever broadening back and congratulate or console? I have to hope she would, so I find myself doing what I would want done for my son. But in the end isn't that what this exchange experience is about? Not just for them but for the ever growing ripple effect of the people they meet and touch. The sharing and caring and becoming smarter as a person about people and how to treat them.

Puppy Please???

Who can resist?

Soft round pink bellies, bad breath we forgive, playful pawing.

I was writing a article for a national magazine and needed some pictures of a garden. Having just put mine to bed for the winter I quickly called me closest friend.

"Sure, come on over" she said.

" I have to bring the boys I am carpooling."

'Great I have some new puppies in." My doggy friend is a weigh station for dogs in need. On any given day she has a dog visiting for a night or two. Today it would be two yellow labby puppies.

"I really want one." exclaimed Julius as he snuggled with the larger of the two puppies.

I will take care of it."

"No." I said firmly

"But why(the last word said long and drawn out)?" asked Chen, "Please?" he was cuddling with the smallest.

"No." Alex my son echoed

Its not that we don't like dogs, we do. We presently have 6 and adore each one, but its alot of work and puppies are even more.

So head down, shoulders fallen in misery they followed me out of the yard leaving the puppies playing hide and seek in the elephant ears.

No Place for Wishes

My day started out in a rush like most of ours. Dogs fed at an ungodly hour followed by breakfast for a multitude of rushing late teens, lunch bags made and stuffed uncaring into heavy backpacks, a quick load of laundry, sort of separated and car pool. Having mastered all of the above in record breaking time.

I thought I would throw in a dentist visit after the car pool.Dr. Williams was awesome or as Julius(my exchange student) told me "Nawesome!", teen speak for just pretty great I think.

Afterwards we went to Hallmark to get a "American Card". Still moving at American mom breakneck speed.

Julius walked up and down the aisles, pondering and looking, taking his time to get the right card. I continued to check my watch, well actually my phone, who wears a watch anymore and jingle my keys. Looking back now I realize I really had no where to go so I guess I was just practicing to stay in tip top rush form.After about fifteen minutes Julius approached me, my heart sank as he had no cards in his hands. I just saw myself repeating the process in another store. How hard could this be I thought. After all my version of card shopping is running(literally and physically) into the store, picking out a card at eye level in the right area, you don't want to send a bon voyage instead of a sympathy, signing my name, not reading the card, stamping and going, I am a American mom, wife and friend and don't have time for such frivolities - does it say birthday then its a birthday, belated birthday, good then I can take an extra day to get to the post office and use the time more appropriately for washing floors or more laundry.

"I have to ask, where do you write the wishes?" Julius asked truly from his heart, I looked at a card he was showing me.

"They come with wishes." I explained pointing out some collection of meaningless words written in colorful ink splashed against the brightly colored page.

"No," he always says No really long its one of his multi second words. "I mean the real wishes, the ones you feel and mean. There is no place on any of these cards for the wishes."

I thought we are so busy that when we send cards we don't even bother to write real wishes anymore.
I am not that busy and my cards will have real wishes from now on